Managing Arguments with Family

There are many articles and lists of suggestions to manage disputes between family members and couples.

The following list includes some suggestions to help with this.

Respect one another
Do not raise your voice or yell
Use your words
- Do not use physical gestures, swearing, threats, embarrassing comments, sarcasm, or calling names
Share the talking time: Give others a chance to state their opinion, or to answer.
- Don’t interrupt or jump to conclusions. Allow others to take their turn in the conversation
Stick to the issue at hand: don’t bring up other annoyances
Consider whether the topic being argued about is worth the discussion
Don’t bring up the past: stay to the precise issue at hand
Don’t use generalizations
- e.g. “you always do this” or “you never do that”
Don’t stonewall, or give the silent treatment
Take a cooling-off period if needed
- Clearly state that you’re doing this: do not just walk out
Admit responsibility for your wrong-doing.
- Don’t make assumptions.
Allow others to explain, listen and ask if you don’t feel that you fully understand their point of view
Remember, this is an opportunity to teac your children about problem-solving, and about appropriate decision-making. Be open, and practice active listening. These are the ingredients for healthy communication.